The BJ:how is Griffy treating ya?
El Chupacabra: don’t know all I know is the the Yankees are in first
The BJ:dude
The BJ:are you saying what I think you are?
The BJ:although I can’t get over the fact that you are a yankmeoff fan
El Chupacabra: I’m from NYC, I just moved to Seattle
El Chupacabra: jack off
The BJ:and?
El Chupacabra: it could be worst
The BJ:so what’s your point?
El Chupacabra: I could be a phillies fan
The BJ:you did not just say that
El Chupacabra: I think i did let me check

	El Chupacabra: it could be worst 

	El Chupacabra: I could be a phillies fan 

El Chupacabra: yep I did
The BJ:all I can say is name on one hand how many phils did steroids in the past 5-10 years
The BJ:name on two hands how many yanks did
The BJ:they are not legit
El Chupacabra: Dykstra

(more…)

Sorry for the lack of content. I’ve been pretty busy impersonating Tony LaRussa on Twitter?

from espn.com

ST. LOUIS — St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony La Russa is suing the social-networking site Twitter, claiming an unauthorized page that used his name to make light of drunken driving and two Cardinals pitchers who died damaged his reputation and caused emotional distress.
The suit filed last month in the Superior Court of California in San Francisco seeks unspecified damages.
La Russa had little to say about the suit.
“I’m not discussing it except to say that our foundation attorney is taking care of it,” the manager told The Associated Press.
Messages left Thursday with La Russa’s attorney and San Francisco-based Twitter were not returned.
The lawsuit claims that someone created a false account under La Russa’s name and posted updates, known as “tweets,” that gave the false impression that the comments came from La Russa. The suit said the comments were “derogatory and demeaning” and damaged La Russa’s trademark rights.
The account bearing La Russa’s name is no longer active. The lawsuit includes a screen shot of three tweets. One posted on April 19 said: “Lost 2 out of 3, but we made it out of Chicago without one drunk driving incident or dead pitcher.”

You may be asking yourself why I would be naming someone you’ve never heard of as “Asshole of the Week”. Well, let me explain. First off, it’s not because of his name, but it very well could be. The reason that this asshat is being dishonored is that he’s a professional sportswriter and baseball Hall of Fame voter that somehow didn’t vote for one of the greatest players of this generation.
The dumbass in question was once named Sportswriter of the Year (1988) and now writes for the Green Valley News and Sun, which is a paper for a retirement community. (Seriously.) Anyway, what’s got me pissed off is that old Corky submitted a ballot of 8 names for the Hall of Fame, and Rickey Henderson wasn’t among them. (more…)

You probably won’t think this is cool at all, but then again, you probably aren’t a fraction as awesome as I am (or this guy).
Word on the street, this “enthusiast” has more autographs in one set of baseball cards (1983 Fleer) than I have in my whole collection. I mostly keep the fact that I even collect autographed sports cards a secret from people other than my two dogs and the elderly priest I sponge-bathe every other weekend when I volunteer at the nursing home down the street. But anyway, this guy is nuts. Good luck to you, brotha.
The story.
Crazy guy’s blog.
Crazy guy’s website.
Sweet jesus, when does spring training start?!

Now that the Yankees have signed CC Sabathia to the richest contract for a pitcher in baseball history, and then added another ricockulous contract for AJ Burnett, they have turned their pursuit to acquiring Derek Lowe, Mark Texiera, Ben Sheets, Lebron James, Michael Phelps, Tom Brady, Michael Jordan, Pele, Nolan Ryan, Joe Montana, Ronaldo, Tiger Woods, Mary Lou Retton, Syd Finch, The Mighty Casey, and the ghost of Walter Peyton. (more…)

Baseball’s winter meetings start in Vegas today, and with them all sorts of shit will start to go down. Billions of dollars worth of contracts will be signed. Trades will be consummated that will effect teams for years down the road. But the first order of business is the end of a career, as Greg Maddux is expected to announce his retirement. From STLtoday.com:

“The news that Maddux would retire was an above-the-fold story in Saturday’s Las Vegas Review-Journal. The righthander won four Cy Young Awards, starting with the Cubs but starring mostly with Atlanta, and he won 18 Gold Gloves, including one this past season. He’ll retire seven wins shy of passing Pud Galvin and Kid Nichols for sixth all time and 19 wins short of moving into third-place all-time by leapfrogging Pete Alexander and Christy Mathewson.”

Now, take another look at that quote for a second. When you’re in the neighborhood of Christy Mathewson (Wins) and Ozzie Smith (Gold Gloves), you’re a helluva player. And when you’re passing pitchers on MLB’s All-Time lists with names like “Pud” and “Kid” that probably pitched 500 innings a year from the time they were 15 until their arms fell off at 35, you’ve been around a while. Excellence AND longevity! Plus, look at that mustache up there! That’s Hall of Fame facial hair! There’s no question that he’s a first-ballot Hall of Famer when his time comes. It’s just fun to look back and realize that we’ve been able seen a rare talent for so long. I really hope he saved enough money to retire comfortably…

I’m an unabashed and frankly, obsessed,  Cardinal fan.  So yesterday’s news about the Cardinals trading for Khalil “Spicoli” Greene, while flying under the radar of most baseball fans, stirred my baseball loins.  In short, I like the move, and here’s why:

1.  He’s a white guy that sometimes wears cornrows!! Sadly, I could not find any good pictures.  This will be particularly interesting from a comedic standpoint.  Long cornrows are just close enough to a mullet to look funny and be accepted by the locals in STL, but they’ll definitely rub the old-school (read: racist) fans the wrong way.  He’ll become a fan-favorite of younger fans, and a serious whipping boy for the old fogies.

2.  He’s better than he showed last season. He was stuck on a pathetic, depressing team, in the worst hitter’s park in the league, and he was one of the only threats in the lineup.  Now he’s on a legitimate yearly contender, in a smaller ballpark, playing a relatively minor role in the success of the offense.  Sounds like a great formula for a turnaround to me.

3.  He’s in a walk year. This benefits the Cards in a few ways.  First of all, it gives him extra motivation to succeed.  If he plays well, they get first shot at re-signing him.  If he’s a bust, the Cards can let him go and wash their hands.  Flexibility is key.

4.  He’s got rare power for a shortstop. He hit a career high of 27 homers in 2007.  I don’t expect anything close to that this year, but 15-20 would be nice.  Especially considering that the Cards have gotten approximately 15 homers total out of all of their shortstops in the past 5 years or so.

5.  He’s got a good glove. It’s pretty common knowledge that he’s already a plus defender at shortstop, which is important to the Cards groundball-heavy staff.  Fielding somewhere in the neighborhood of 10,000 ground balls with infield coach Jose “The Secret Weapon” Oquendo will make him better, as will LaRussa and Duncan’s detailed defensive charts.  There is a serious chance that he could end up as a gold glove candidate.

6.  He’s relatively cheap. He’s signed for $6.5 million for next year, which looks like a hee-uge bargain when the Giants just signed the bloated husk of Edgar Renteria for 2 years and $18.5 million.  If that’s the market, Furcal can expect $15 mil a year, easy.  No thanks.

7.  He’s got a passion for the game and wants to win. The guy broke his hand punching a stationary object during a game last year.  Some may call it stupid, but I call it competitive fire…and stupid.  Hey, nobody’s perfect.

8.  He didn’t cost the Cards anything important. Reportedly, the Cards got him for two minor league relievers.  One has been confirmed as Mark Worrell (can’t imagine why), and the other is a player-to-be-named-later.  Neither would have played a role in this year’s team, and it’s doubtful they would ever have made an impact on the big club.

9.  He’s escaping the worst hitting park in MLB. Petco is where fly balls go to die.  It covers more square miles than some island nations.  Take a look at his home/road splits, and he looks like an All-Star outside of that park.

10.  Did I mention he’s been known to wear cornrows?!

So, news reports today confirm that the loud beeping sound we’re all hearing is the dump truck full of money that the Yankees are currently backing up to CC Sabathia’s doorstep. The rumor is a contract in the 6-year, $150 million dollar range. They must be paying by the pound these days.

Also rumored are some perks like access to a private jet, his own island, midget slaves, and a lifetime supply of Burger King. Personally, I hope he takes the Brewers’ offer of $100 million for 5 years with unlimited cheese, sausages and Miller products.