1. AT&T.

Listen, you sonsabitches, I don’t give two rats fucking that it isn’t time for a motherfuckin’ upgrade. I want a fucking iphone. Now. I already went into the apple store. Spent an hour going through the registration process with the correct upgrade price only to have that fuckin’ B.O. smelling motherfucker say “Uh, don’t know what’s going on here. We can’t control anything on AT&T’s end. Sorry”. Yeah, sorry. Fuck you. I want my fucking iphone already. So then I leave the store only to find that this motherfucker killed the sim card on my original phone. Great. I drive to an AT&T store. They ask me, “Well, why do you want to fix this phone? Where’s your iphone? It says here you have an iphone.” So I punch the guy in the throat. He dies. The manager calls the cops, and I barely get away. Then I call the Apple store. Tell them to fuck off. Then I call AT&T. They tell me to fuck off. Then I call Joe Pesci. He fucking kills everybody.
Bottom-line: Fuck you mutha fuckin’ cell phone companies. Especially AT&motherfuckingT. Get your fuckin’ shit together.
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