1. Kicking Ass.
Well, there’s no questioning the awesome-ness of Magneto’s power. I mean who’s really gonna fuck with a guy that can literally rip the iron from your blood? He’s a brilliant mastermind with huge plans for world domination, however, those plans are always foiled by a cripple in a wheelchair? And he’s old, probably shares robes with Gandalf the Grey, and he’s old. But he can fly.

2. Ricockulous Costume (aka Ability to Pull Vagina).
We mentioned the robes. His colors, purple and red, provide a good combination of evil and power. And that helmet looks like something that could deflect a Vulcan mind-meld. He has super strength and stamina due to his control of electromagnetic fields, so we imagine that impresses the ladies down at the nursing home.

3. Would We Want To Have A Beer With This Guy?
No. The generation gap would probaby be a bit much. Plus, he’d probably bitch quite a bit about being stuck in that Nazi prison camp growing up. Anne Frankly, he’s probably not much fun. And we’d be twitchy from the homoerotic vibe thing he’s got going on with Professor X. Although, being from a European descent from way back when, he probably enjoys some decent darker beers, which we can appreciate.

Score:

1. Kicking Ass.
Hellboy is a demon. He’s strong as shit. He handles The Good Samaritian, his big fuckin’ gun, like a champ. And his attitude, is like ours, shoot first ask questions never. We’re pretty sure you don’t get up after a punch in the face from The Right Hand of Doom, either.

2. Ricockulous Costume (aka Ability to Pull Vagina).
Shit, he looks like the devil. How bad-ass is that?! Pretty sure Red could pull any Suicide Girl he wanted. So we’re big fans and would probably dress exactly the same if we found ourselves born in the bowels of hell with an apocalyptic destiny. Might let the horns grow out though.

3. Would We Want To Have A Beer With This Guy?
Easy. Yes. It would be a bar crawl. Most likely ending up with all of us passed out in a dumpster behind the dirtiest strip club in town.

Score:



Head-to-head: You might think, based on sheer mutant power, Magneto would destroy Hellboy. But, you’d be wrong. Hellboy’s ability to pull more ass and hold his booze, along with that demon shit, put him over the top.

Advantage: Hellboy